This guy is an idiot (but the pictures are badass).

Purging Like A Sorority Sister At Big John's...

So this has been a common post-election theme among many blogs, but I like it...

I can't wait until the following people fade away into obscurity:

1) Joe the broke, hypocritical, tax-evading, welfare-receiving, unlicensed pipe-cleaning, never-gonna-get-elected-to-any-public-office, shit-head, wannabe plumber.

2) Karl Rove, the Jabba the Hut of Washington politics without whom the world will be a much better place.

3) Sarah Palin and her gaggle of family members; granted, she will still be in the news, but she won't make the front page. You'll have to dig a bit to keep track of this Republican Valkyrie, at least for a year or two.

4) James Carville; you picked the wrong Democrat you stupid f$#%.

5) Joe Lieberman, Jerimiah Wright, William Ayers, Louis Farrakhan, Tony Rezko (not that they really mattered in the first place.

6) Tom Bradley (the African American gubenotorial candidate that the Bradely effect is based on)

7) Elizabeth Hasselback; the show is called "The View," not "The Views." I demand ideological solidarity from my middle-aged, female socialites. Time to take out the trash Joy Behar.

Junior Kick-Start

I feel as though I should attempt to write a profound wrap-up of this years election cycle, but I think I'm going to leave it be. We've all read the news more than usual, we all know the outcome, and we're all excited about it. That's good enough for me.

I will say this, the election of America's first African-American President is the most monumental positive event that has happened in my lifetime. I will always remember this election and the feelings that came with it; vindication, trust, hope, giddiness, pride, and (as of the last few days) arrogance. And just in case I ever forget how great if feels at this moment, I know I have plenty of friends who were right there with me that would be more than happy to remind me (and I got my copy of Wednesday's New York Times just to be sure).

The monuments of our generation are no longer 9/11 and the complacency of the Bush years. We are the generation of young voters who, for the first time ever, split 2-1 for a presidential candidate. We are the demographic that put Obama over the edge. We changed the game.

And I'm damn proud of us for it.

One Proud Papa

My pumpkin made it onto Yes We Carve! (half way down the page)

Getting Downright Emo This Sunday...

I'm a really big fan of this, knowing full well how much of a sap I am.

(anyone recognize the song in the background?)  

Kyle is a big fan of this, and we all know how big of a sap he is. 

And if Charles doesn't tug at your hear-strings even a little bit, then you may not have a heart in the first place. 

Halloween '08

Three things I learned from my first-post college Halloween.

1) Halloween is actually a one day holiday in most parts of the country; not a blank check booze-fest that encompasses the weekend before, week of, and weekend after Halloween.  

2) Creating your own Halloween props is way more fun than buying them. 

3) Party affiliation has no bearing when it comes to a female's desire to look like a skeezer; nine of ten Sarah Palin impersonators are democrats.  

Some Seemingly Good Ideas are Best Left Unexplored

Thursday we went to celebrate the release of a product that may down in history as one of the biggest culinary disasters of all time.

The Product: Baconnaise, the bacon infused mayonnaise (believe it or not, its veg friendly).

The Premise: 

"Come celebrate the release of Bacon Salts newest product, Baconnaise, by watching Bacon wrestle Mayonnaise in 200 gallons of mayonnaise."

"We'll be offering free BLT's all night"

"There will be scantily clad female athletes fighting each-other in whipped condiments."

Things They Forgot to Mention:

- You will get covered in mayonnaise.

- The BLT's are actually two pieces of shitty bread and some wilting produce covered in Baconnaise (with no actual bacon to be found anywhere).

- The scantily clad female athletes are members the University of Washington Rugby team (shudder)

  

 

When all was said and done, Mayonnaise suffered big losses on numerous fronts.  

He lost the wrestling match.

His reputation is now forever be tarnished by his marriage of convenience with Bacon.

Everyone that went to this event is now ten times more likely to prefer Mustard on their sandwiches.

Despite some real drawbacks the event was actually a blast and, as my friend Kyle brought to my attention, "Only in America."